One of Those Cliche Chatroom Fics
by freeProphe
Summary: Prophe's attempt at humour. Henry is a noob. Most pairings are homosexual. Inside jokes come with later chapters.
1. And So It Begins

**One Of Those Cliche Chatroom Fics**

**WARNING: THIS IS SO TERRIBLE AND RANDOM IT MAY BURN YOUR EYES!! IF YOU DO NOT LIKE TO READ UTTER STUPIDITY WRITTEN IN THE EARLY HOURS OF THE MORNING, TURN BACK NOW AND SAVE YOUR INTELLIGENCE!! SIDE AFFECTS TO READING THIS FANFICTION MAY VARY!! NOOBINESS MAY ALSO VARY HAHA. ^^ IT IS NOT WITTY, FUNNY, OR EVEN GENERALLY AMUSING. IT IS PLAIN STUPID BUT IT WAS EXTREMELY FUN TO WRITE. :)**

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**GOD**** has signed on.**

**;)SexyMan!** **has signed on.**

**GOD: **What the hell is with that name?

**;)SexyMan!: **we shuld alwayz stay tru 2 ar selvs u no :)

**GOD: **Of course. But yours is a completely untrue statement, I'm sure.

**;)SexyMan!: **u r jus hatin on da sexines ::heart::

**GOD: **...

**GOD**** has signed off.**

**;)SexyMan!: **HATIN ON DA SEXINES!!!!!!!!!!!

**iDoctor**** has signed on.**

**;)SexyMan!: **way 2 b obveus howard ::heart::

**iDoctor: **O.O how do you know my name?!

**;)SexyMan!: **r u sayin dat u dont recanize me ur insanle sexy cuzin henry?!?!?!?!?!?

**iDoctor: **...

**WAR-E-UR** **has signed on.**

**iDoctor: **oh shit!!!! gtg!!!!

**WAR-E-UR: **your not going anywhere! if you sign out ill kick your ass!

**iDoctor: **can't this wait for a private chat, Gregor? I mean, it's not exactly something you need to broadcast to the entire thing to the world!!!

**WAR-E-UR: **im going to kill you!

**iDoctor**** has signed off.**

**WAR-E-UR: **dammit come back here!!

**WAR-E-UR**** has signed off.**

**;)SexyMan!: **...

**;)SexyMan!: **y doz evr y 1 leev me?!?!?!?!?!

**;)SexyMan!: **grrrr!!!!!!!!

**;)SexyMan!**** has left the chatroom.**

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**Lol_the_light**** has signed on.**

**Lol_the_light: **hello is anyone here?

**noOne!!!: **Just me. Joined for the lulz, but no one was here.

**Lol_the_light: **who are you?

**noOne!!!: **My name is Stellovet, although I'm not too fond of it. And you?

**Lol_the_light: **what?!?! it's you?!?! i'm your cousin, Luxa~!! DX

**noOne!!!: **Oh really? That's interesting. When did you get internet?

**Lol_the_light: **...today.

**noOne: **Lol seriously? So Vikus kept you from the internet that long?

**iDoctor**** has signed on.**

**noOne!!!: **Hey Howard.

**iDoctor: **why does everyone recognize me?!!?

**Lol_the_light: **your name is obveous, cousin.

**iDoctor: **neither of you have seen gregor, right???

**noOne!!!: **Avoiding him again?

**iDoctor: **... slightly. he's looking for me.

**Lol_the_light: **why would he be looking 4 you?

**iDoctor: **...

**noOne!!!: **...

**Lol_the_light: **???

**WAR-E-UR**** has signed on.**

**noOne!!!: **He's sleeping with him.

**Lol_the_light: **WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!!!!

**WAR-E-UR: **?

**iDoctor: **there's a good explanation, luxa. and gregor i'm coming over tonight alright?

**WAR-E-UR: **HOWARD!!!!! -glomps-

**noOne!!!: **Have fun, Howard ;D

**iDoctor: **thank you stellovet. -glare-

**Lol_the_light: **explain NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**WAR-E-UR: **explan wat?

**noOne!!!: **That you're sleeping with Howard.

**WAR-E-UR: **...how did u find out abowt that???

**noOne!!!: **...I thought it was pretty obvious.

**WAR-E-UR: **...

**iDoctor: **it's really not that big of a deal...

**WAR-E-UR**** has signed off.**

**iDoctor: **gtg ;)

**iDoctor**** has signed off.**

**Lol_the_light: **...

**noOne!!!: **...

**noOne!!!: **Sex at my place?

**Lol_the_light: **ill be there in ten min.

**Lol_the_light**** has signed off.**

**noOne!!!**** has signed off.**


	2. Mystery of the Missing Waffle

**One of Those Cliche Chatroom Fics**

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**;)SexyMan!**** has signed on.**

**;)SexyMan!: **hey is n e 1 hur?!?!

**;)SexyMan!: **...no?

**;)SexyMan!: **im al alon?!?!?!?!

**iDoctor**** has signed on.**

**;)SexyMan!: **-gasppppp- HOWARDDDDD!!!!!! :D

**iDoctor: **O_o do you spend all of your time online?

**;)SexyMan!: **wel, se, twoday i waz goin to eat the last wafle dat waz in the freezar & it wasnt thar so i waz woreed and den i find out u eat it!!! grrrrrrr1!!!!

**iDoctor: **........i didnt eat that waffle.

**;)SexyMan!: **do not lie, fool!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**iDoctor: **no, i srsly didnt eat that waffle.

**;)SexyMan!: **wel if u didnt who did?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

**iDoctor: **there are 7 other ppl living in that house. it culd have been one of them.

**;)SexyMan!: **but dat meens thy lyed 2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -gasppppp-

**GOD**** has signed on.**

**;)SexyMan!: **im hvin wiithdrawls alredy!!! i ned that wafle!

**GOD: **...?

**;)SexyMan!: **-gaspppp- GOD!! tel me whu at the wafle!!!???

**iDoctor: **henry, your getting out of hand.

**;)SexyMan!: ** i dont fit in 1 hnd!!!

**iDoctor: **...i think were talking about to different things.

**GOD**** has signed off.**

**;)SexyMan!: **EVN GOD HZ TRND AWAY FROM ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!!

**iDoctor: **...calm down.

**;)SexyMan!: **U CLM DWN!!!!

**;)SexyMan!**** has signed off.**

**iDoctor: **.....

**GOD**** has signed on.**

**GOD: **Is the moron gone?

**iDoctor: **i hope so.

**GOD: **Aren't you the guy with the gay lover?

**iDoctor: **O_O how do you knw that?!

**iDoctor**** has signed off.**

**GOD: **Well, that was interesting...

**GOD**** has signed off.**

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**WAR-E-UR**** has signed on.**

**Lol_the_light**** has signed on.**

**Lol_the_light: **hey gregor.

**WAR-E-UR: **hi luxa. do u no were howard iz?

**Lol_the_light: **...how wuld i no?

**WAR-E-UR: **u liv in the same howse.

**Lol_the_light: **ur the 1 fucking him!!! u shuld no!!!

**WAR-E-UR:**...

**WAR-E-UR**** has signed off.**

**Rojo_Picante**** has signed on.**

**Lol_the_light: **hey who r u?

**Rojo_Picante: **No habla ingles. Estúpida.

**Rojo_Picante**** has signed off.**

**Lol_the_light: **????O.O

**Lol_the_light: **that wuz wierd....

**Lol_the_light: **who wuz that?!?!

**noOne!!!**** has signed on.**

**GOD**** has signed on.**

**WAR-E-UR**** has signed on.**

**;)SexyMan!**** has signed on.**

**Lol_the_light: **wow lots of ppl.

**noOne!!!:** Hey Luxa. Wassup?

**Lol_the_light: **nto much. u?

**noOne!!!:** Watched a good movie a bit ago.

**GOD: **Oh.. is the moron here?

**WAR-E-UR: **yah he iz.

**GOD:** Oh great.

**;)SexyMan!: **GOD!!! U LEFT ME ERLEAR!!! EXPLANE!!!!!

**GOD:** I shouldn't be forced to be around morons.

**;)SexyMan!: **-sobb-

**;)SexyMan!**** has signed off.**

**Lol_the_light: **gregor do u no were howard is?

**WAR-E-UR:** hes a little tied up rite now.

**Lol_the_light: **wut do u meen by that?!??!?!

**noOne!!!:** Did you tie him up and hide him somewhere, Gregor?

**WAR-E-UR:** ......maybe.

**WAR-E-UR**** has signed off.**

**Rojo_Picante**** has signed on.**

**Rojo_Picante:** iHola mi amigos!

**Rojo_Picante**** has signed off.**

**Lol_the_light:** that prsn is rlly creepy........

**GOD: **I think she's Spanish.

**Lol_the_light:** ...

**GOD: **Surrounded by morons...

**GOD**** has signed off.**

**noOne!!!**** has signed off.**

**Lol_the_light:** that waz rude......

**Lol_the_light**** has signed off.**


	3. In Which Nothing Important Happens

**One Of Those Cliche Chatroom Fics**

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**GOD**** has signed on.**

**;)SexyMan!**** has signed on.**

**GOD: **Ugh. You again.

**;)SexyMan!: **y r u alwyz so meen 2 me?

**GOD:** Because you type like you have brain damage --not that I doubt it, of course.

**;)SexyMan!:** thtz soooooo meen!1! y wuld u sey smting so meeeeeeen!1! ppl shuld b nicer abowt tingz lyk tat bcuz bein meeen hrtz ppl ad ppl dont lyk bng hrt :( it is meeen.

**GOD:** Point proven, yet again. Maybe if you typed in a language that everyone understood we wouldn't have this type of miscommunication. I was lost after "thtz sooooooo meeeen!11111"

**;)SexyMan!:** ..............................u r mean.

**;)SexyMan!**** has signed off.**

**GOD: **Finally. I think this is the first time I got him to sign off on ME instead of ME signing off on HIM. Mission accomplished. I feel proud of myself now...

**iDoctor**** has signed on.**

**WAR-E-UR**** has signed on.**

**WAR-E-UR:** :D! HOWARD! i havent seen you for awhile!

**iDoctor:** what are you talking about? I talked to you this morning...

**iDoctor:** oops.

**GOD:** Don't worry too much about it, Howard. We all know you two are sleeping together. It was a bit obvious after Stelly told everyone in the chatroom. And the way you guys flirt in public... lol.

**iDoctor:** i didn't know it was that obvious....

**WAR-E-UR:** it is.

**GOD: **Yes, it is.

**TEHBANEZ**** has signed on.**

**noOne!**** has signed on.**

**Lol_the_light**** has signed on.**

**Lol_the_light: **hey everyone!

**GOD: **As long as you can type better than a brain dead orange, you can stay.

**iDoctor:** noooo, kick her out!

**WAR-E-UR:** its just luxa, dont freak.

**iDoctor:** i'm freaking out BECAUSE it's luxa! she's a demon.

**WAR-E-UR:** shes also in the chatroom.

**iDoctor:** oops.

**GOD: **Just keep working at it, Howard. You'll get it right someday.

**TEHBANEZ:** MIIIIIICEEEEEZZZ! OM NOM NOM NOM!

**TEHBANEZ**** has signed off.**

**noOne!: **That was... different.

**Lol_the_light:** i was going to stab howard, but now i'm just freaked out.

**WAR-E-UR:** ditto.

**GOD:** I third that.

**iDoctor:** ^what they said.

**;)SexyMan!**** has signed on.**

**GOD:** I thought I scared him away forever. But noooo, he's BACK.

**;)SexyMan!:** u r stl so meeeeeeeen 2 me ad i wnt 2 no y. tre iz no rsn 4 u 2 nt lyk me 4 i am prfcty lykable. zo tl me plz or te ppl in tis cht rmm gt it!1! nd i meen it 2!

**Lol_the_light:** is it just me, or has he gotten worse?

**noOne!:** It's definitely not just you, Luxa. Speaking of which, you, Howard, and Gregor now miraculously type better. Which is a good thing, of course. But when?

**iDoctor:** gregor's mom.

**WAR-E-UR:** ...dont you be talkin' bout my mama like that!

**iDoctor:** ...i meant that she taught me some things I never knew how to do before.

**WAR-E-UR:** .............................................................

**WAR-E-UR**** has signed off.**

**iDoctor:** what did I say...?

**Lol_the_light:** ...wow. you don't know what you said?

**noOne!:** What you said sounded like you got freaky with Grace. Which is a completely odd image, let me tell you, and I don't think I'll ever be able to get it out of my head. Thanks for the mental scarring btw.

**GOD:** Ugh. I think I might be sick. That's.... uuuugh.

**iDoctor:** o shit....

**iDoctor**** has signed off.**

**Lol_the_light:** they're either about to have the biggest fight in history and break up, or have the biggest fight in history and then have random make-up sex in the middle of the argument.

**noOne!:** You must be a prophet.


	4. Frisbees and Frogs

**One of Those Cliche Chatroom Fics**

**::Frisbees Fly Fluidly For Fifty-Five Feet Fighting Frolicking Frisky Frogs::**

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* * *

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**iDoctor**** has signed on.**

**Lol_the_light**** has signed on.**

**Lol_the_light:** hey howard :) gregor's looking for you btw.

**iDoctor:** i know. i'm avoiding him. he's been really... strange lately.

**Lol_the_light:** strange how?

**;)SexyMan!**** has signed on.**

**;)SexyMan!:** gregr hwrd iz luking 4 u!1! he seyz u wnt tlk 2 hm & u r ignrin hiz cllz. y rnt u tlkng 2 hm?

**iDoctor:** it's none of your business you two!1 stop trying to help!

**iDoctor**** has signed off.**

**;)SexyMan!: **do u tink thy hd a fite? tht wuld b bad!1!

**Lol_the_light:** probably. they haven't been getting along well.

**;)SexyMan!:** o no. i hop thy sty 2gher. thy r a gud cuple.

**Lol_the_light:** no they arent. you're the biggest idiot i've ever met!1!1111!

**Lol_the_Light**** has signed off.**

**GOD**** has signed on.**

**;)SexyMan!: **im drvn evry 1 a wy 2dy! y iz tht?

**GOD:** They're horrified by the way you type. If you go now, and learn to type properly, everyone will come back online to welcome you.

**;)SexyMan!:** rlly? thtz awsm! ill b bck l8r!11!

**GOD:** Good. I'm glad you've finally seen the light.

**;)SexyMan!:** THXXXX!

**;)SexyMan!**** has signed off.**

**GOD:** That was way too easy.

**;)SexyMan!**** has signed on.**

**;)SexyMan!:** tch me hw 2 typ gud?

**GOD:** ...

**;)SexyMan:** plllllzzz! il nvr ask u 2 do smting 4 me evr agen11! plllllzzzzzzz! or il stlk u 4 te rst of ur lfe! plllllzzzzz!1!

**GOD:** Alright, alright, enough already! Get here in twenty minutes. If you're late, the deal is OFF, got it!

**;)SexyMan!: **YAY. b thr!

**;)SexyMan!**** has signed off.**

**GOD**** has signed off.**

**iDoctor**** has signed on.**

**iDoctor:** good he's gone! i'll go get luxa...

**iDoctor**** has signed off.**

**WAR-E-UR**** has signed on.**

**noOne!**** has signed on.**

**Dulcet:)**** has signed on.**

**WAR-E-UR:** i know im not smrt, but i think thats dulcet...

**noOne!:** Wow, Gregor. That was amazing. I would have never been able to guess that!

**WAR-E-UR:** relly?

**noOne!:** Of course not. I was kidding.

**Dulcet:):** i am not really good at typing so im sorry if it takes me awhile to type yes its dulcet hi :)

**iDoctor**** has signed on.**

**Lol_the_light**** has signed on.**

**Lol_the_light:** so are you going to tell me why your avoiding gregor?

**iDoctor:** he's been really moody lately. i think he might be pregnant. i mean, it could happen!

**noOne!:** For a doctor, brother, you're incredibly stupid.

**WAR-E-UR:** stellovets right. i cant get pregnat, im a guy. dont they teach u these thingz? im just pizzed u 4got our 1 yr aniversery. idiot.

**WAR-E-UR**** has signed off.**

**noOne!:** Well. I guess I'll be taking my leave now. Things have become very awkward all of a sudden, and I don't really want to be caught up in it. If Henry logs on, tell him I'm at home. ;)

**Lol_the_light:** ...

**iDoctor:** ...

**noOne!:** What? It's not what it sounds like.

**Lol_the_light:** ...

**iDoctor:** ...

**noOne!:** ...whatever. Talk to you two later!

**noOne!**** has signed off.**

**iDoctor:**...

**Lol_the_light:** ...

**Lol_the_light**** has signed off.**

**iDoctor**** has signed off.**

**;)SexyMan!**** has signed on.**

**GOD**** has signed on.**

**Dulcet:):** hello you two if youre looking for anyone im the only one here sorry ):

**GOD:** Don't worry about it. We're just here to test Henry's new typing skills. Now, type what I told you to.

**;)SexyMan!:** Frisbees fly fluidly for fifty-five feet fighting frolicking frisky frogs.

**GOD:** Much better. I hope you can keep it up.

**;)SexyMan!:** I think I can try.

**Dulcet:):** oh by the way henry stellovet said she's at home she wanted me to tell you.

**;)SexyMan!:** srsly! srry bt im dn w/ths lssn!1! thx 4 tching meee!11

**;)SexyMan**** has signed off.**

**TEHBANEZ**** has signed on.**

**YouNeed2Die**** has signed on.**

**ScentSeer68**** has signed on.**

**therealking**** has signed on.**

**TEHBANEZ:** I WILL MAKE THE POPCORN AND THE MICEZ :D

**YouNeed2Die:** King Gorger.

**therealking:** Twirltongue, what a lovely surprise. What exactly do you want?

**YouNeed2Die:** You know what I want, your highness, but you're too incompetent to deliver it properly. Your kingdom lacks representation, you know. Taking me as your mate would be most beneficial, both to you and to myself. You would have proper heirs, well-bred and willing to do as you please. And I would convince those who have turned against you to rethink their ways. They would realize that you are a good leader, and that we need you to guide us.

**therealking:** It's a possibility, one that I shall have to think over. You should come by and we'll discuss it.

**therealking**** has signed off.**

**YouNeed2Die**** has signed off.**

**ScentSeer68:** i hate politics.

**TEHBANEZ:** DO POLITICS TASTE GOOD?

**ScentSeer68:** they taste like the caps lock key. speaking of which, why is yours on?

**TEHBANEZ:** I ATE IT.

**ScentSeer68:** of course you did.

**ScentSeer68**** has signed off.**

**GOD:** Sigh. And now there is no one left to have a proper conversation with, I suppose.

**TEHBANEZ:** AWWW BUT YOU HAVE ME! :D

**GOD:** My point exactly. There's no one to have a conversation with.

**TEHBANEZ:** WELL FINE IF THAT'S HOW YOU'RE GONNA BE. I DIDN'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU ANYWAY. IT'S NOT LIKE THERE'S ANYTHING TO DO NOW THAT TWIRLTONGUE'S EATING POLITICS WITH THEREALKING D:

**GOD:** ...sometimes I worry about you. You must have received a lot of head trauma.

**TEHBANEZ:** NO ONE TALKS ABOUT NORMAL FOOD ANYMORE ): WHAT IS TRAUMA? IS IT A KIND OF FISH?

**GOD:** Wow. I was right. There IS something seriously wrong with you.

**TEHBANEZ:** THERE IS NOT. I AM PERFECTLY NORMAL.

**TEHBANEZ**** has signed off.**

**noOne!**** has signed on.**

**Lol_the_light**** has signed on.**

**GOD:** This is going to sound strange, but... it IS impossible to eat politics, right?

**noOne!:** What kind of conversation did we miss? We've only been gone for twenty minutes.

**Lol_the_light:** something very traumatizing must have happened to him. you need to get your head checked GOD.

**GOD:** That sounds like a brilliant idea right about now. Thanks for the advice.

**GOD**** has signed off.**

**noOne!:** Anyway. Do you think Howard and Gregor worked out their differences?

**Lol_the_light:** i hope so. they go well together. kind of like peanut butter and jelly.

**noOne!:** ...

**Lol_the_light:** well... i'll be going now.

**Lol_the_light**** has signed off.**

**noOne!:** That was very anti-climatic...

* * *

**Note:** FFN screwed up a couple things. Originally, Stellovet's username had three exclamation points, now it has one. In fact, all of the excessive exclamation points in the story have been downsized to one. It's kind of sad. D: Also, the underlines were all deleted, but I'm too lazy to go back and re add them. Erm, this chapter was a bit choppy, I apologize. Heh. Was just a little preoccupied as I wrote it. And the ending is horrible, but this is humour, so... lol.


End file.
